I met her in a jail cell. Her charges?, they don't matter. What matters is that if you stopped long enough to see "her", not her lifestyle but her, you could tell, she was empty and void of life. She was full though, at the same time. She was full of shame and guilt because of her lifestyle.
I had great hopes for her, but she was closed off. She had been hurt one too many times. The road of life and disappointments had made her callous to what I had to say.
As class started, she talked about her job and the fact that she liked the attention. She could tell me every gift she had gotten from every ministry that walked through the doors of her work.
This was her hope. She knew she would never measure up to "those peoples" expectations, and with shame and guilt being her guides, why even try?
She was transferred to another jail, released on bond, and was due to start a program the next week. But because her identity was wrapped up in attention and shame and guilt were her guides, she wanted one last horrah, before her freedom, as she saw it, was taken.
"Just one more time", she would say.
Now today her body will be laid to rest. I can not tell you how many people say, as they are sitting across from me in a jail cell: I just wanted to do ______________,one more time."
Our human need, our selfish need is to, do what we want with no regard to the consequence.
The world is Satan's playground and he gets people caught up in the thrill of "just one more"......
A game a chance, roulette, Russian or otherwise still has the same outcome.....the house always wins.
So today, stop, take the time to notice the person, not the profession, habit or addiction...take time. Not the pat answer of "God loves you". Because right now God is not real to them....the drug is, the attention is, the hurt is, the _____________is.
