Why Against the Grain started.

13 years ago: January 2002 I was on my way to work. I was a successful real estate agent, had a loving family and was very active once again in church.  

Monday morning I was on my way to a sales meeting.  I traveled a very beautiful road, lined with very mature trees that covered both sides and as it started up a steep incline, off to the right was an exclusive neighborhood in which Micheal W. Smith lived.  The sun was shining, we had had a great Sunday at church and Monday had come, but I was missing something.  My life had no meaning Sunday afternoon through Saturday night.  I went to work making more money than I ever had before but there was no purpose.  Sure we stroked a check and fed a village for a month, but what was my purpose here in Williamson County TN, one of the wealthiest counties? 

I called my husband to ask him to take a year off work and pray about what God would have us do with our life. 

Needless to say, Rob thought I was crazy.  You see we were getting ready to build a 6000 sq ft house with a 3 car garage and had all intentions of getting new cars. Our talks ended up becoming arguments as I felt there was more than just going to church when the church doors were open. 

Finally, Rob drew a line in the sand and said "I am the leader of this family and I will NOT close my business down to ask God what He wants".  And I said " you are right! You are the leader of this family now lead us spiritually!" 

Rob finished up his jobs, closed down the business and got before The Lord for a one year Sabatical. 

As the year went one Rob was so excited about what he was learning. He would share and we would talk.  About halfway into the year, Romans 12:1 & 2 really resonated with him and we felt that nothing else this would become our family motto. 

 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.  Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

But we still had no idea what else was about to happen.  The year was coming to an end we still had no answers. Then comes the women's retreat. 

The weekend was on passing on the baton to the next generation but more importantly what I remember was the story of the Butterfly and not opening the cocoon. As you see the butterfly struggling to break free from the cocoon, if you help the process by opening it for him, it'll be paralyzed and never fly. That weekend was also filled with our oldest daughter totally being a rebellious teenageer and having the "mom knows nothing" attitude. The young woman, whom I had driven to the retreat, put my daughter in her place and said " if only I had had a mother like yours".  

Isn't it funny how we always want someone else's mother and will take the same advice our mother gave us, but we listen when it comes from someone else. 

I guess the "spiritual high" of the weekend got to me, because I opened my mouth and out came "I'll be your mother".  

I quickly called Rob told him we adopted this young woman and she comes with three small boys. At that point and time Rob firmly told me to get home and we would talk about it. 

Upon arriving at home, I tell Rob everything about the weekend.  He runs downstairs where his laptop is and types out an outline for what he now sees as what God had been telling him for the past year about His heart: His heart for the poor,  the widow and the orphan. How we are to walk in messy relationship with people and not just give things away. When we just "do" for people, we are that person with the scissors cutting open the cocoon. We paralyze people when we continue to do for them what they with "relationship" can do for themselves. 

We call her up. Invite her and the boys for dinner. We then tell her that we are wanting to walk with her in relationship to help her achieve her goals. We were not going to give her anything, but help her become self-sufficient. 

We started that week with one mom and three kids and by June we had 9 moms and 28 kids. 

Deciding this was much bigger than us we figured out we needed help. 

We went to a couple of churches and after being told it would never work and the women would take advantage of us we went back to the moms.  We told the moms that the churches would not help us and if they were going to take advantage of us to please let us know so we could stay working and make more money. 

This was one of the most profound answers from the women: we don't trust the church anyway.  They come in with a program to work with us. They find out how hard it is, the budget gets cut, the leader leaves and we are left once again, alone. 

Rob started the next day working on our 501(c)3 paperwork. 

And that is the short version of Against the Grains beginning in 2003. 

The 180 Curriculum was written to answer questions from the moms on how to break the negative cycles in their lives. 

It is now offering hope across the country to men and women in jails, prisons, transitional housing, homeless shelters, crisis pregnancy centers and churches.